Hello,
I highly recommend you read Annie Barret's review of last night's show, it's hilarious. She almost reached Slezakian heights.
It's been a busy day so this is coming out later than I expected. With the results being announced soon, this is going to be abridged. However I may work more on it later. To paraphrase Repeat Randy, "you know what I love?" I'd love for Jacob Lusk to go home now. He's horrible. My blog has blown up over two things. The first is the mystery song from the "Blue Blood" episode back in December. The second is a lot of people are finding my blog with the google.com search "jacob lusk sucks". I have 3 times more readers today than yesterday, that's all driven by people disliking Jacob Lusk.
This isn't anything personal against Jacob, I just hope he fades into obscurity asap. Why do I have a feeling though that Jacob Lusk will survive again this week? Although on an ew.com poll 92% of people predicted he'd be going home tonight. I'm fearful for Haley Reinhart after the idiot judges less than enthusiastic review of her singing of "You and I". That's another great Lady Gaga song and I have no idea what the judges are talking about. But then again no one said you had to be smart to be an "American Idol" judge. They couldn't get enough of Jacob Lusk.
Ryan asks Randy why this week is so important and Randy jabbers on for far too long. Jackson pulls out "who's in it to win it" and "nows the time to do it". To think he gets paid for that nonsense.
"Keiren dim the lights, it's time for my review".
This is Lady Gaga's version of "You and I":
Here's my Top 5 in overall ranking.
5) Jacob Lusk, who else, up 1. He keeps on moving up because he keeps on surviving somehow.
4) James Durbin, down 1 spot. He's probably safe tonight.
3) Scotty McDreary, up 1 spot. He's probably safe tonight and if I was a betting man I'd bet he'll win. Then he'd go on to have a Lee DeWyze non-career.
2) Haley Reinhart, same as last week. I'll be so pissed off if she gets voted off tonight.
1) Lauren Alaina, same as last week. I don't think she'll win, but it wouldn't surprise me if she makes the finale.
We start with the worst first. Again I don't write about the show chronologically. I write based on their performances. No surprise Jacob Lusk holds down the two bottom spots.
10) Jacob Lusk sang Nazareth's "Love Hurts" and it was a hot mess. This song offended on every level. Jimmy urged him to sing this song to "spread his audience". While singing the song he actually reviewed himself when he sang "it hurts, it hurts". Yes it does Jacob and badly. Overall he was absolutely awful and what was that atrocious ending? Why do so many people say he can sing when he can't? His voice has some power but sounds weak to the ears. My favorite review of this performance was Lopez's. She said that he "brings out the tricks at the end". Jacob was giving her the nasty skank look. I could imagine him saying to JLo in his head, "Girlfriend you better not go there. No way girlfriend. I'm Jacob Lusk and I'm the best." Grade: F and I only wish I could give him a lower grade.
9) Jacob Lusk again, this time he tortured Jordin Sparks and Chris Brown's "No Air". What did either one of them do to him? Before he sings, Ryan helpfully reminds us that "the pressure is on". Ryan asked Jacob if he thought he could win. I thought to myself he has no chance of winning. However if you would have asked me a few weeks ago if he would have made the Top 5, I would have said "no". Again his voice sucks so much and he tries to dance. Of course it looks like the bathroom dance more than anything else. At least I think he's trying to dance, or is he passing a kidney stone. That's how I look when I'm passing a kidney stone. Again the producers send the choir to save him but there's only so much they can do. If this was the original "Star Trek" I could see Scotti saying "Jim, I'm not a miracle worker".
The judges were absolutely stupid when offering their alleged "critiques". JLo flat out lied to him. She complimented his "showmanship", called him an "amazing performer" and lastly told this whopper, "voice one of the best that's ever been on this stage for sure". Jennifer what the hell are you talking about? After which Jacob in a high pitched screech said "yea baby yea". What a freak is Lusk. Randy lost me after "yo, yo uh", I'm sure the rest wasn't worthwhile. Steven was watching something else or off in his own little world.
Ryan asked him what kind of an artist he wanted to be. Jacob jokingly, he was joking right, said he wants to be "an artist that appeals to everybody". Grade: D-. I was feeling generous. Thank goodness, there wasn't a third performance.
8) James Durbin screamed 30 Seconds to Mars "Closer To The Edge". Quite simply that's a boring song and he gave a boring performance. Sheryl Crow must have been sharing with Randy, she said "I got to sing with James". Jimmy said something there isn't anything "between him and greatness". From their comments you'd think the final five were Sarah Brightman, Whitney Houston, Mariah Carey, Robert Plant and Freddy Mercury. Steven said Durbin "kicked that song's ass". Really? The hype continued with Jennfer saying he was "ready for stadiums". Yes I think some stadium would hire him as a janitor. She also started one of the themes of the night, that this competition is James to lose.
Then Randy, who apparently is madly in love with James, said "Dude listen" told him where he "can go as an artist" and name dropped Jared Leto. Randy is a master name dropper. Then Randy for the second time of the night said that "James is in it to win it". That's one of Jackson's greatest hits. He then thrust his finger and said, "he wants it Ryan, he wants it". Grades: James: D+, Randy: F.
7) Scotty McDreary sang a very dreary version of Elvis Presley's "Always On My Mind". He should have sang Willie Nelson's version. That's the most amazing of all the versions of this song. Anoop Desai also did a very good job with this song a couple of years ago. I would have went with the live version. But the back up singers on this version makes this song even more amazing. Get ready for the goosebumps on this version:
Now in the right hands, that's how that song can sound. Scotty did his best but his voice isn't suited for this song. If he would have been James Durbin he would have started crying and dedicated it to his family. Here comes the judges, let the hype begin. JLo called him a "well round artist" and that his performance was "so beautiful". Randy called him the "youngest veteran". And "if it ain't broke, don't fix it". Randy how about if it's virtually the same thing every week, what should he do then? They had to wake Steven up for him to say it was a "beautiful rendition". (Does anyone think that Tyler and Lopez will be back next year? Yeah either do I. Don't worry Barnacle will be back. Where else is he going to go?) Scotty, with Ryan's help, went to the grandma card again. Grades: Scotty: C-
6) James Durbin then put on an acting display singing Harry Nilsson's "Without You". See how it should sound:
We saw the "drama" of him not being able to rehearse the day before. He pours on the tears and here comes the screech. Did anyone really believe this was a real performance? The producers are manipulating him so he can create a moment. But it didn't work. I just wish the producers would let things happen naturally. Durbin you also got to get rid of that ugly earring. Randy starts off so intelligently "yo...James yo", stated the performance was "emotionally perfect" and the competition is "yours to lose". Puke!! Steven Tyler said, "that's a beautiful thing". Then JLo again overdoes it with the praise. Amongst the things she says, "everyone knows you can sing", the "heart and soul to back it up", an "artist true, true artist" and "he's amazing you guys". His grade was hurt by his screeching and the judges over hype. Grade: B-
5) Scotty McCreary singing Montgomery Gentry's "Gone". That's a cool song. Before he sang the song they showed him with his arms around 3 girls. Now what was the point of that? Are TPTB afraid he's not coming off heterosexual enough? I'm not sure why they would care about his sexuality. Sheryl Crow, drinking the same kool aid, said to McDreay "you've got a big career ahead of you". In what Sheryl? Jimmy said people will be "really moved". Um okay Jimmy. (I love how the producers have realized how much of a train wreck Jimmy has been as a "mentor". Even though they said they won't have mentors this season, they have realized they need to.)
McDreary was much better than usual and he should sing upbeat songs more often. Especially compared to "Always On My Mind". He looks like he had fun with it, although leaping down 3 steps seemed to be forced. Steven said that he "saw you dance with the devil tonight". I love Scotty later showing his cross and saying he loves Jesus. Scotty what Steven was trying to say was you finally let loose and had fun. In other words you were acting your age. Randy then amazed us with his lack of verbal dexterity. Here's a brief recap of his idiocy. "Yo listen", "here's the deal", concert Scotty" and "you know what I'm lovin' right now". He also said his favorite repeat of this show "this guys in it to win it too". That's at least the third time he said it during this episode. Even Ryan got in on the hype: "this is hot tonight". Grade: B. Randy D-
4) Haley Reinhart sang The Animals "House of the Rising Sun". I know this is the one the judges and most people were swooning over. I actually thought this was only her second best performance of the night. Grade: B.
3) Haley Reinhart sang Lady Gaga's "You and I". Sheryl predicted she'd have a moment with this song. I don't know why the judges didn't like it. I think it's yet another great Lady Gaga song. I love Haley and her voice. I'm not sure if Gaga would like someone singing her songs with clothes on. After Haley's performance I thought she might actually be this season's "Idol". For the second week in a row she was given the pimp spot. Haley just has an amazing voice. I also love how Haley disagreed with the judges, it seems she swore off the microphone. Keep it up Haley. J Lo and Steven Tyler were fairly praiseworthy. But unfortunately they had to turn Randy's microphone on. He spewed this gibberish, " yeah listen uh the real deal is that look I mean I'm not sure it's that great of a song and I'm sure you could probably thought of other things" He recommended Joss Stone. Grades Haley: B+, Repeat Randy: F
2) Lauren Alaina sang Carrie Underwood's "Flat On The Floor". Another excellent song from Miss Underwood and a fine performance by Lauren. Grade: B+
1) Lauren Alaina sang The Righteous Brothers' "Unchained Melody". Grade A-
May 16th, 2011. I'm still finishing this blog as I can.
themusicaddict
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