Why does love have to be such a pain in the ass?

Hello,

Two weeks from today will be my 1 year anniversary of my divorce. It's been a year of pain, soul searching but ultimately healing. I've been thinking about how I feel I've been ready to go back to dating. I've met this really cool girl and it seems we have some chemistry. However I've been over thinking the relationship, trying to figure out everything about it. We've only known each other for a few days and I realize I'm putting way too much pressure on having a romantic relationship. The problem with that is many, but for me mainly I'm just not ready to have a relationship yet. I've realized that again.

Thankfully I do have some time to reflect. I can think through things while exercising, driving and at work. I came to this amazing and such common sense realization this morning. This woman and I can be friends and then if things work out there then we can explore other options. One of the things that really sunk my first marriage was a lack of things in common and friendship. Those are two things that I want to have before adding a romantic relationship on it. I also had stopped seeing my therapist as things were feeling good. But this funk I need to go back and do some follow up. This therapist has helped so much, pointing out things that I wouldn't have seen on my own.

Again if you are divorced, especially if you are newly divorced, go to counseling. If you feel it's not working then go to another counselor. It's a very small percentage of people, if any, who couldn't be helped by counseling. This same thing applies to widows/widowers. In fact their grief/ sadness is probably even more intense.

themusicaddict