5 More Minutes A Day

Hello,

I've been hearing some feedback that I'm saying bad things about my ex-wife. Please in anyway do not take anything I write as negative to her. She's a really good person, I wouldn't be in love with her if she wasn't. The marriage didn't work for her. We are both moving on, I'm hopefully within in a year will be back to whole. I'm in no hurry to meet someone else, I think I will chill for awhile. If the Lord brings someone into my life, I'm not going to turn it down. But at least for awhile I'm not going to seek her out either.

I was iming with an old friend yesterday and we were talking about our marriages. Hers is good, they are about to celebrate their 15th anniversary tomorrow. My wife and my anniversary comes up on June 11th. That would have been 16 years for us, strangely enough our divorce will probably be final about the time of our anniversary.

Anywho I was thinking about that conversation as I tossed and turned in bed last night. I realized if I had spent only 5 more minutes each day our marriage might be saved now. If I would have given her a non-sexual backrub, wrote a note, taken away one thing from her busy schedule, cuddled with her etc. I think 5 minutes a day spent on those things could have made a big difference in the happiness of our marriage for both of us. Anyone who reads this blog, please make that little extra effort to have a happy marriage. 5 minutes a day is so worth it in avoiding a divorce.

It reminds me of that line from the old song, "Regrets, I have a few".

Speaking of reminders, this song has always reminded me of my wife:



Another song about the regret of lost love. This one is very eloquent and painful:



Today my wife went and filed the papers with the court. I then came up to hang out with my kids. She and I went to the local credit union and got my signature notarized. That's where it sank in even more. After we filled out the paperwork and we headed home I said to my wife, "Just like that 16 years down the drain". This is a relationship we both have fought long and hard for. That's almost 35% of my life, someone who I still love very much and just like that poof. Seriously if you read this and don't work hard to improve your marriage, you are an idiot.

Believe me divorce is not a path you want to take if there is anyway to save it. If you are in a physically abusive relationship or in a relationship where someone is cheating then maybe that would be a relationship to let go. But Tiger Woods wife seems to have taken him back, maybe there's always hope for any relationship. There is no abuse in our marriage and no one is cheating, but my wife has just reached the point where she thinks there's no hope. I disagree but I'm not going to even think about trying to make her do something against her will.

Stef I will always love you and will always hope you come back to me, no matter how long that may take. My parents divorced and remarried several years later. They probably are one of the most unlikely couples to get back together. I guess there's always some hope, no matter how slim it is.





themusicaddict