Moving out continued

Hello,

I went and filled out some paperwork for a job that I'm hired for that starts in May today in Ogden. I have my kids tonight and my wife's house is between where I filled out the paperwork and my parent's house (West Bountiful). I asked her and she reluctantly agreed I could come an hang out there until the kids get home. I want to put as few miles on my car as possible, it just broke the 170,000 mile mark. With her at school for a couple of hours I was there by myself. I got a bunch of clothes and moved them to my car so I can take it back to my parent's house. Taking clothes out of what was once my closet is another kick in the gut. Again another sign that this divorce is happening. Mentally I knew it was happening, but my heart still hopes for a miracle. I believe in miracles and this would be an amazing miracle.

On this cold snowy spring day, it's another one of the saddest days of my life. I'm going to have a few more saddest days of my life this year.



A couple of days ago I had written how my wife was my Balm of Gilead. That's true but I now need to find a new Balm of Gilead. With the big hole in my heart I've been looking at match.com for someone to fill it. I'm not a stud by any stretch of the imagination so that may take awhile. There's different types of contact you can have on match.com with other people. There are e-mails, winks plus you can im potential mates. So far I've received 3 winks. The first one I received was from a babe in Billings, Montana. She's allegedly 30 years old, but I was very skeptical that this was a real person. I was even more confused when I received another wink from another 30 year old babe. These aren't normally women that would get in contact with a 42 year old, overweight man with 4 kids. I was furthered suspicious when both profiles were practically the same. For those of you on match.com be careful. I reported the suspicious profiles to match.com.

When she got home, I went and worked through a whole bunch of my books. Eventually I'm going to have to move those, I went through my books and got rid of a bunch of them. I moved out a lot of my stuff and now have a lot of stuff at my parent's house. They are going to be cool about letting me store my stuff for now. Hopefully soon I can find a good job and move out of my parent's house and gather all my stuff in one place. 42 years old is just too old to live at the parent's house.

My wife has been a lot less cold today to me, I appreciate that. She's still an amazing looking woman. Being around her is still a thrill, I still remember why I fell in love with her. I look at these profiles on match.com and so many of these women don't stack up to her. Just out of force of habit I compare potential mates with her and there are so few women who don't measure up to her. I have very high standards already.

Aargh! Men please don't be stupid like me. This isn't a place where you want to be. The place I currently am in is hell.

themusicaddict